


Blood Rain

by Zetal (Rodinia)



Series: Rare Ships Creation Challenge [25]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Blood, Dean is a jerk, Demon Blood, Implied Torture, It's Raining Blood, M/M, Not a good relationship, References to hell
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-11
Updated: 2017-06-11
Packaged: 2018-11-12 15:30:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 986
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11164776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rodinia/pseuds/Zetal
Summary: It's raining blood.  Dean draws the obvious conclusion and calls Crowley for help.





	Blood Rain

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the Rare Ship Creations Challenge  
> Prompt: Non-Aqueous Rain  
> Partner: @Brothersonahotelbed

What was the point of having the King of Hell on speed dial if you still had to put up with this kind of crap? Rain was one thing. Dean was used to rain. Hell, sometimes Dean liked the rain, when he didn’t have to be out in it trying to light some bones on fire or drive through flooded roads to get to the next town. A soft rain, warm fire… nice romantic night.

This was not cool. This was not soft. Technically, Dean supposed, this was not rain. Rain was made of water. This was blood. What the hell caused blood to rain from the sky? Dean had only two answers that made any sense, Sam couldn’t come up with any others, so Sam took Castiel and Dean called Crowley.

“Thought you said you told your demons to stay the hell away from us, Crowley.”

“Darling! It’s so good to hear from you. I’ve missed you too.” Dean rolled his eyes. He so did not have time for this. “What’s got you all worked up? Moose is okay, I hope?”

“Yeah, Sam’s great. We’re just both really disgusted by the fact that it’s raining blood. Now, call me unimaginative, but blood rain? That sounds demonic to me.”

“And what exactly makes you think that a demon who won’t listen to my orders to lay off the big showy displays is going to listen to my orders to lay off the Winchesters?”

“I would think you’d have better control by now! Your throne that shaky?”

“Course not. But this is Hell! Everyone’s ambitious, and everyone thinks they’re clever. Some of them are right, and I’m keeping a close eye on them. Some of them are morons, and that’s the type you’re after.”

Dean dropped the phone as he realized he was hearing double. “Dammit, Crowley, you been hanging out with Cas? Don’t DO that!”

Crowley looked out the window of the Impala, and then, to Dean’s annoyance, opened the door and stuck a hand out. He tasted the red liquid that covered his hand. “Huh. That’s blood, all right. Was hoping this might be a false alarm, but, no such luck. If you want some good news, it’s not human blood, it’s demon.”

Dean smacked the steering wheel and turned to glare at Crowley. “And that’s good news how? It’s still blood! Demons don’t have blood in their Hell forms, they need a meatsuit, so there’s still humans bleeding for this!”

“Probably humans who were gonna die anyway, if the demon ever left. We’re not exactly known for treating our toys with any kind of caution.” Crowley pulled out a handkerchief and wiped his hand off. “Moose, you might want to get your pet angel to zap you out of here. You go out there, you go to a place you really don’t want to go back to.”

Sam made a face, but asked Castiel to come get him. After all, Crowley was right – it was probably best he didn’t go out and get himself covered in demon blood. Dean kept glaring. “So? How do we find the demon who’s doing this?”

“This car up for a drive through the blood?”

“Better than walking. Baby can do it.” Dean started the ignition. “Hear me, Baby? You can do it.”

Crowley took the opportunity to teleport up to the front seat. “You know, for Hell, this would be considered rather romantic.”

“Ew.”

Crowley sighed. “Aim for the thickest part. Should be a center.”

Dean grimaced but did as Crowley said, driving toward the thickest part of the rain. They found the center, an apartment complex. Crowley poofed in and back. “Old friend of yours. You want a crack at him?”

“Not bad enough to get out in this crap. What do you mean old friend of mine? I don’t have demon friends.”

Crowley put a hand over his heart. “Oh, now that hurts, Dean. What do you call me?”

Dean rolled his eyes. “For some bizarre reason that had better occur to me soon, I call you my boyfriend.”

Crowley smirked. “Remember Edith? One of Alastair’s pets until you came in to show them up.”

“Ugh. Her.” Dean remembered Alastair’s pets. Rose, Edith, Maria, and Teresa. They’d hated him for the attention Alastair gave him – and for his talent. Rose, Maria, and Teresa were dead. He’d seen to that during his time as a Knight of Hell. He’d never been able to find Edith, though. “Just kill the bitch and stop this rain.”

“Your wish is my command.” Crowley disappeared again. “The area will be covered in blood until normal rain comes to wash it away. Least there shouldn’t be any more.” It had already let up, and as they watched, it came to a stop. “We should probably get out of here before people come out of their houses and start asking questions.”

“Yeah.” Dean started driving for the edge of town. “I’m heading home. Can’t take Baby to a car wash, not like this.”

Crowley waited patiently. It was a four-hour drive back to the Bunker, and the whole time, Dean didn’t say a word. Dean reached for the door handle and stopped. “You’re still here? Hell running itself so well you can just sit in a car and goof off?”

“I keep thinking, one of these days, I will do Dean Winchester a favor – several in fact – and not have to push him into a half-hearted thank you. All I do for you, and that’s asking too much from you?”

Dean shoved the door open and got out of the car, avoiding touching the blood as much as possible. He gave Crowley a deep bow. “I’m so sorry, your highness. Thank you so much for cleaning up your subject’s mess.”

Crowley rolled his eyes and disappeared. Dean got out the supplies to start working on giving his Baby some love. She deserved it.


End file.
